Friday, June 17, 2005

Truth and Consequence

We all know that that the infamous DOOCE got fired for things written on her blog about her company. We all know that blogs are somewhat public and that anything that you write MAY be read by someone that you don't want to. On the other hand, we also know that these blogs are a way to vent, and are a creative outlet for our anger, depression and joy. This is in fact a private diary - just one the world can see.

Back in the beginning of our relationship, I read Jason's personal diary. It is something that I am still, 8 years later, embarrassed that I did. The thing was is that it was pages and pages about this other girl that he really liked, and one little mention of me on the last page.

I was hurt. But didn't feel that I should/could have the right to say something to him about it because I invaded his personal space. I could be hurt, but I could not be mad because these were HIS FEELINGS.I ended up asking him about it later on, and he told me the truth, that he stopped writing after dating me because he now had me to listen to his thoughts and fears. He no longer needed a spiral bound book to bounce ideas off of, or vent to, because he now had a partner in life to hear him out and share things with.

One of the company's I used to work for had a major round of lay-offs right after 9/11 and morale was pretty low around the office. So the CEO thought it would help to bring in this jackass doctor guy to help us with our feelings. While the majority of it was a bunch of corporate pycho-shit ("If we stop working we're giving the terrorists what they want! The only way we will overcome this is to work harder and show them that they can't stop us!"), one thing he talked about really hit home. He told us that "your feelings are yours, and yours alone. No one can take them from you, no one can tell you not to feel the way you do." And it's true - those are your thoughts and feelings and no one can make you feel bad for having them or tell you not to feel that way. And while others may be upset over your feelings, they can not be mad at you for having them.

The thing about the written word is that emotions can get lost in the translation. Scarcasim is misread as action or truth, frustration may seem like anger and tongue-in-cheek comments make you seem like a shallow bitch or even come across as threatening words.

So, does that mean you can't write about your feelings? Does that mean that you can never put anything down that may upset or offend ONE PERSON that may, or may not, ever read it? And can you get mad at someone for voicing thier feelings? Especially on their own website?

The funny thing with "truths", is that while many may think it - the one who actually says it outloud is the one judged the harshest.


Blogger Mr. Hibbity Gibbity said...

So . . . mind if I ask what this all pertains too?

7:05 AM  
Blogger Rude Cactus said...

Regardless of where this is coming from, I think you're right. Thats why its the messenger who so often gets killed.

10:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

that is oh so true...

1:37 PM  
Blogger HipMamaB said...

Just about getting caught talking smack about someone on your blog. Good times...

10:23 PM  

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